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Archive of ‘Funny’ category

Searching for something?

I find it absolutely fascinating to look at the stats of this blag and see what people are typing into search engines that lead them right here.

Of course a bunch of you google “Dori Manela” — which makes me wonder who googles me and why! I wish I knew! Some google “Dori Manela blog” — aww you guys are looking for this! One googled “Baruch college sucks” (and found my blog, love it) and another, “My roomate Dori” (roommate spelled like that) Who’s roommate is Dori and why are you googling that phrase — what did you expect to find?

Anyway, I wanted to touch on a VERY ALARMING SEARCH that led to me. Now, anyone who knows me knows that I absolutely, positively adore IHOP. I have always preferred breakfast foods to all others, and IHOP is just delicious. They have so many types of pancakes that are all delicious and lots of yummy syrup flavors! Plus, everything you order comes WITH pancakes — so you never have to choose between an omelette or pancakes, because you get both!

Anyway, I was very hurt to find that some asshole found my blog by typing in the search phrase “IHOP sucks.” Yeah, yeah, I know that exact phrase DOES appear in this blog (quoting someone else who had said it) — but I am the #8 search result for “IHOP sucks”! Nooooo!! I should be #1 for “IHOP RULES” and “IHOP IS THE BEST EVER.” So next time someone searches “IHOP sucks” I hope they see this entry and see that I LOVE IHOP. I tend not to get along well with people who don’t like IHOP. In fact, I can think of a couple of people who’s entire friendship with me is based solely on a shared love of IHOP. It brings people together.

Anyway, to keep this list going. Not gonna go through them all, just a couple of my favorites. One person searched “why the us is better than england” and got me. And 2 of my most favorite people I’ve never met and never will meet found me by googling “xkcds” — YES!!! I am #2 in xkcds! Randall Munroe, if you are reading this. . .please love me.

I’d like to end this entry by trying to bring up my result in “IHOP rules” — which I will officially work into every entry I write going forward. So…

IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES! IHOP RULES!

Everything old is new again

Two things:

1. I was walking up the stairs to exit a subway station when someone says to me, “Excuse me Miss – you dropped something.” Since I was holding on to a few things, it certainly was plausible that I would drop something, so I looked down to see. At that moment, the guy says, “SIKE! He then turns to his friend and said, “Did you see? She looked!” as if I wouldn’t have believed him or something. Um, not only did I have no reason to doubt what he told me, but WHO SAYS SIKE?! What year are we in and is that even funny? Why is it funny that I thought I dropped something? I just don’t get it!

2. I was at my friend’s birthday party, and some guy comes up to Missy and I and says, “What are you, like, 16!” So we were obviously annoyed since he knew we were there for the same friend he was there for, and why was he acting like that? So we didn’t continue talking to him. A little later on, he came up to us again and started talking. Still annoyed from before, I said, “What are you, like, 12?” He was like “Why would you say that to me, why are you being like that?” So I told him it was in response to what he said to us earlier. He claimed to have never said that — so we told him we both heard it, and he did say it. He then put his fingers in the shape of a “W” with his thumbs touching, and put it up to his forehead — the universal sign for WHATEVER made popular in 1995 from Clueless (along with the Loser “L”). Then he walked away, clearly way too cool for our company.

Once again — what year is this?? We still make “Whatever” W’s? We still say “Sike”? Sure, we all know that “everything old is new again” — but I’d like to think we can be more selective when it comes to what, exactly, we make new again.

Thanks and have a great night, herbs.

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