I am the Worst Person in The Woooooorld

Sorry for my long absence from the blag! Sometimes life gets in the way. My heart feels warm and mushy because of all of you who have been asking where I’ve been! I still can’t believe people care about anything I have to say. But this will motivate me to actually write a book one day…

It’s been a very busy week, but luckily this week will be a short one because we are closed on Good Friday! My office is hardly ever closed because we follow the stock market schedule. So, when they’re open, we’re open. Last year Good Friday fell on my birthday, so I was especially happy. I was one happy Jew.

I have lots to tell you all!

Book Review TK
I finished Rethinking Thin. I want to do an official review, but in my rush to get to work this morning I stared directly at the book and didn’t think to actually take it with me. A total brain fart! Does that ever happen to you?

I want to wait and review it when I have it in front of me for reference. I will say this — it was fascinating. I have a much clearer understanding of weight and why we are the way we are. I will get into this more later this week in my review. Stay tuned!

POM Review
I received my POM juices from POM Wonderful! I tried one and it was a bit more tart than I like things — but mixed with some Diet Sprite and Vodka, it would be the perfect refreshing drink! Vodka optional, of course. I will be saving the rest of my free bottles for warm spring/summer days when I can take it outside, sit with a book, and drink in healthiness mixed with not-so-healthiness of Sprite. Some of you would probably enjoy it along, but it is not for me in its true form. My favorite thing about it? The only ingredient is pomegranate juice! I love, love, LOVE  that. “No added sugars, preservatives, colors or cheap filler juices.”  Read about the health benefits here. Do you think I could bring it with me to a bar and asked it to be mixed with my drink?  😉

Hehe, Juice Couture.

Brownie Bites
What else? Well, the Erin Baker’s Organic Brownie Bites that Missy got me for my birthday are almost all gone already! My favorite thing to do it crumble one up and mix it into my Vanilla Chobani/Bauman’s Pumpkin Butter combination. Truly the perfect breakfast. And the boy loves them too! I often see empty wrappers laying around his room.  I was sad that we flew through them so fast, since the shipping price on their website adds up — the three boxes I ordered came to $24 with shipping! But yesterday I made a discovery — THEY SELL THEM AT MY HEALTH FOOD STORE! Aaahhh! They only had the Walnut flavor which is fine by me! I bought 3 boxes and am now very happy. These little brownies are so chocolatey and great, truly the perfect snack and all 90 or 100 calories. I love brownies.

Missing My Best Friend’s Birthday  … 2 years in a row
While it seems from this blog that I have been all brownies and smiles lately, that is sadly not the case. My GI problems are getting in the way of my life. My best friend’s birthday was on Saturday, and she planned to go out to a bar in the East Village. During the day we enjoyed a spa day to celebrate (I got a Hot Stone massage) and after relaxing all day were ready to have some fun at night. It’s been a long time since I dressed up to go to a bar and I was excited! I packed a few outfits to bring to the boy’s, along with some jewelery choices and really great gold Arturo Chiang shoes that I have been looking for an excuse to wear.

I got to the boy’s and was relaxing before it was time to shower when the pains began. I usually get my stomach pains in the same place — high up in my stomach, right under my chest. They are usually very intense, and come and go every few minutes. This means they are spasms. Sometimes the pain is worse than others. On Saturday, they were intense. Very intense. I was crying every time I felt one come on. I couldn’t move, but I didn’t want to miss Rae’s birthday. I was hoping they would die down so I could start getting ready, since it was getting late and I needed to get in to the shower. I tried to get up, but found myself curled on another spot of the bed. I couldn’t even sit up. I got myself onto my back and it felt wrong. I felt like the pain might feel better if I was on my stomach. I tried to turn over but couldn’t move; the pain became worse when I moved. Finally, I got myself onto my stomach but it felt even worse than on my back. I tried to go onto my side and failed. I tried again a couple minutes later and was able to curl on my left side. That seemed to help, and the pain became a little less intense. I was putting off calling Rae because I really wanted to make it — I missed her birthday last year because of my stomach and didn’t want that to happen yet again.

The pain subsided a little but so I went into the shower. I’m not gonna lie — it was hard. Standing there was hard, I felt weak and the pain was coming in waves. During the shower I knew there was no way I could spend time at a bar, possibly standing, and talking to people. I couldn’t even imagine a cab ride feeling this way.  I knew what I had to do.

I got out of the shower, back into bed and told Rae I could not make it. I felt like the worst friend in the world.

I asked the boy, who is a doctor, if it is possible this is all fake. Maybe none of this is really happening. Maybe nothing is actually wrong with me and the pains aren’t there. 

He said that as a physician, he knew with 100% certainty that my problems are real. I had multiple tests that all confirmed the problems, that all pointed to the same condition. It is not normal to experience the things I experience, he said.

Maybe it’s not normal for other people, but maybe it is normal for me — this condition is MY normal. Therefore, nothing is wrong, I told him. For me, this is normal.

He said if I was born this way, then yes, it would be my normal. But I wasn’t born this way. I have an exact incident I could point to that caused all of this to happen. I can pinpoint that incident, that infection, as the time everything changed for me. It is not fake. It is real.

And I know that. I know this is real but I can’t help but question it when things go badly at inopportune times — ie, my best friend’s birthday TWO YEARS IN A ROW.

I even went so far as to point out that I was conveniently fine on my own birthday. Yet on hers, I was in excrutiating pain. He said, when you have these pains at other times, is it on days you have something special planned? No, I said. Usually it happens at work on a normal day. There you go, the boy said. It is just unfortunate chance that it happened today. It happens at times, and today was one of those times.

I know this. But I can’t stop feeling like the Worst Person In The Wooooooooorld.

The real Worst Person in The World is Simba. I can’t take it. He is out of control and has been SO much worse lately. The HMPHs don’t stop. The hyena laughter and the cackling “kekekeke” laughter. The shouting out words and phrases in a high pitched voice. The reptition of the same sounds over and over. The huge pre-laugh WHOOP that he makes before every burst of laughter. Can’t. Take. It.

4 Way Class Comparison TK
As I’ve mentioned, Melissa at FitnessNYC gave everyone at the blogger events 2 free passes to Physique 57.  She loves it there (as does Kelly Ripa) and constantly raves about it. She also belongs to Exhale for the Core Fusion classes. I ordered the DVDs (haven’t tried them yet) and they came with a free class! In addition, my gym offers Transfigure, taught by a Core Fusion instructor and incorporates the same “Lotte Berk” ideas. I have taken Transfigure 3 times so far and am fully addicted. It really is the most comprehensive workout and I am always ready to collapse and scream in pain. Instead, I only sometimes collapse and instead of screaming in pain I let out a big sigh of pain at the end of a set.

So, as I am addicted to Transfigure (after just 3 classes), I am REALLY excited for my two upcoming Physique 57 sessions – 4/12 and 4/23, and my Core Fusion class on 4/25!  I also want to take advantage of the free class The Body offers — this class is the same idea as well. Once I have all four variations under my belt — Physique 57, The Body, Exhale Core Fusion and Transfigure I want to do a four way compare and contrast on here as a resource to anyone thinking of trying them out! I will schedule The Body as soon as I can  fit it in so I can write that exciting blog post!

By the way, if anyone told me a year ago that I would be addicted to spinning and strength classes, I would have laughed in their face. If anyone told me this five years ago, I would have spit in their face.

BAKE SALE
Please visit Meghann’s Bake Sale. All funds raised from this event will go directly to her Team in Training Efforts to support the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. And I am particularly excited because my brother’s girlfriend/practically my sister Mallories is making Mix-and-Match Nut Butter Cups! For my birthday last year, she made me these AMAZING cookie crusted Peanut Butter Cups. Best thing of my life. No joke! This uear she made me delicious Carob Almond Butter Cups which I loved as well! So go bid!

I bid on a couple items myself!

Running Outside Attempt #1
I tried running outside for the first time yesterday in Central Park. The run also had a purpose — get to my apartment on the East side from the boy’s on the West side. I immediately got an intense pain on the outside of my upper thigh. I had to stop. And today my shins are both killing me. Next time, I will try stretching first. I want to be able to run!

Although, the day before I did an OK GO Coached Run on the treadmill and they tell you to go very fast, so maybe I was just recovering from that. I hope! There is nothing more I want than to be able to run outside on beautiful spring and summer days. I did get to walk both to and from the boy’s yesterday so that was a very nice outdoors workout regardless!

My gym has this Alter G treadmill that is supposed to make you weightless and it is very easy on the joints. Maybe I should try it one day! It’s like running in a bubble.

Contest 
Visit What Do I Eat Now for a chance to win a great contest! It includes POM Green Iced Tea which I would LOVE to try as well as a bunch of different cookies, and me love cookies.

I have lots more to write about this week, so please check back. I will try not to fall off the face of the earth again!