Archive of ‘Stupidity’ category

Hey, get out your camera! It’s a supermarket!! – 10/25/06

It’s always easy to spot the tourists visiting Manhattan. We see them taking pictures in front of popular landmarks like Grand Central Station and the Empire State Building, and even some not so popular locations . . . like random apartment buildings — but that is okay, since these people most likely don’t have anything that looks like this in their hometown. Today, however, I saw a couple taking a picture that surprised me . . . and then confused me.

The wife was standing in front of D’Agastino pretending to be about to walk in (the exit door, since that was directly under the store’s sign), while her husband took a picture of her. I resisted the urge to go up to them and say, “Um… you know this is a supermarket, right?”

I don’t know where these people are from, but I am fairly certain they are exposed to supermarkets — actually, superstores in the league of Wegman’s, Safeway, Publix and Winn Dixie, among many others. Stores like these blow D’Agastino away. Walk into Wegman’s and find yourself in a world where your every wish is literally at your fingertips. In college, we used to go out to dinner at Wegman’s. They had freshly prepared food — all kinds — in addition to everything else you would ever need to live AND enjoy life while you’re at it. You name it, Weggie’s had it. Same can be said for the other superstores I mentioned — and believe me, these are ALL over this country. You can even find Whole Foods in New York City, if you want a store with lots of great prepared stuff.

So why is D’Agastino so fascinating to these people who are most likely used to stores far superior? D’Agastino is really just your regular run of the mill supermarket, they’ve got the basics plus a little more . . . but nothing over the top, nothing spectacular, nothing to make it that much better than Food Emporium or Gristedes really. Sure, it’s a major improvement over Key Food. But then again, what isn’t?

I guess it is very cool for these people to go back home and tell their friends and family they went to D’Agastino . . . I just don’t get why. And if they really feel the need to take a picture in front of a New York City grocery store, might I suggest The Gourmet Garage? Now that is a unique store. Plus, they’ll find lots more cheese.

But all things aside, let me reiterate that this couple took a picture in front of a SUPERMARKET. If groceries are truly the highlight of their trip to New York City . . . well, they’re a different kind of people. Clearly.

I’m sorry if I sound like an asshole, or if I sound like someone who is from New York so I don’t get the touristy idea . . . but I really don’t think that is the case. I understand taking a picture of the Statue of Liberty as much as the next person . . .but I like to think that I draw the line at popular food chains.

Next time I am in a place with what I have labeled a superstore, I will be sure to take a picture in front of it. Because after shopping at places far superior to D’Agastino, I know what is truly cool in grocery shopping.

Crazy hat day? No, just trying to keep warm.

When I was at the Gap with my mom and brother, I picked up a hat and tried it on. I was intrigued; the hat was soft, not itchy, not tight to mess up my hair or make me feel uncomfortable, with flaps to — and here is the best part — COVER MY EARS. In other words, I found the perfect winter hat. Just what I never knew I always needed.

my hat

I walked up to my family members while wearing the hat to get their thoughts. They laughed and said it looked a little silly, but when I told my mom how comfortable and warm I felt, she offered to buy it for me.

As soon as I walked outside, I knew I made the right choice with the hat. I felt warm and cozy. And when my mom and brother started laughing over how ridiculous I looked, I didn’t even care much. I was warm. My ears were covered!

A week later when my mom laughed at me again, I knew it was because I looked cute!

I began wearing the hat on every cold day. I knew it looked a bit silly, but when it was that cold I would wear my coat hood over the hat anyway, and I tend to pull the hat off on the subway anyway. And again, I cannot stres how warm and soft the hat is — and it doesn’t mess up my hair. In fact, I believe it improves my hair. One day I forgot to bring my hat, and my ears nearly froze off. It was a sad day.

So this week I was on the subway after work on one of the coldest days so far. There was freezing rain and snow outside, and I had just walked 4 avenues to get to the train. I was freezing. The train was so packed that I couldn’t maneuver to remove my hat — but I didn’t want to anyway. I was freezing! And I would just have to put that hat on again after a couple stops when I got off the train.

After one stop, three obnoxious guys got on. It’s actually really hard to put into words just how obnoxious they were — you really needed to be there to understand. Also, I had my headphones on so I was trying to tune them out. There were 3 guys, abut 18 or 19 years old. Clearly uneducated. Clearly stupid. White, but clearly trying to be black. They were being ridiculously loud and I am positive the other people were as annoyed as I was. The most obnoxious of the three starts freestyling — loudly. He even used the N word, and I was sad to not see anyone around us who might have wanted to hurt him for that. It was his lucky day, I guess. He and his friends were being stupid and laughing, and then it became personal.

“Hey, tell that girl you like her hat!” followed by a lot of laughter amongst the friends — as if I wasn’t standing right next to them and couldn’t hear them. They laughed like it was the funniest thing they ever heard. I was mortified not because I cared what they thought but because I didn’t want the other people on the train to look at me. If there is one thing I can’t handle, it is when the attention of more than 3 people at a time is focused on me. It scares me to death, and I try to avoid drawing attention to myself as much as possible.

I pretended not to hear them, even though it was impossible not to hear them, being that I was RIGHT NEXT TO THEM. My stop couldn’t come soon enough. And really, the hat might be silly, but it’s not so ridiculous as to be an object of public ridicule! It’s from the GAP! How bad can anything that widely mass produced really be?

Needles to say, when I got back outside in the sleet, I was thankful that I hadn’t forgotten my hat like I had the day before. My ears were thankful, too.

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