How does that saying go? The one about making the same mistakes over and over again?
Over the last few months, I beat myself up relentlessly over my hip injury (Part 1 and Part 2). I constantly blame myself. I felt the first twinge of pain during a Core Fusion class. When I went back to class, I felt the pain during the same section, the gluteal part of class. And still, I went back. I didn’t want to give up the workout that transformed my body and my mind; the workout that truly changed my life.
And, to be totally honest, I didn’t want to lose the muscles and strength I worked so hard to achieve for an entire year.
That decision turned out to be incredibly stupid. What started as a minor ache that hurt only during class, what was likely a nothing injury that would have been easy to resolve with some ice and rest, became a torn labrum that put me out of commission for months. The injury cost me two thousand dollars in medical bills (and that is on TOP of my monthly health insurance premium). The injury derailed me from running, caused me to drop out of my spring half marathon that I already registered for and caused me to question whether I would be able to run the ING NYC Marathon that I spent a year – and a bit of money – qualifying for.
I berated myself for months. “Why did you keep exercising even though you knew something was wrong? Why didn’t you rest? Why couldn’t you think about the long term, your marathon, your general ability to work out? Why didn’t you find a different exercise that doesn’t actively hurt your hip? Why did you ignore the pain and keep doing the same movements over and over again? Why are you such an idiot?â€
I’m such a bitch to me! I don’t recommend being your own worst enemy. It is not very nice. Eventually I eased up on myself. Let this be a learning experience, I told myself. At least it happened before marathon training and not during. It could have been worse. I will never make the same mistake again.
You would think that learning from such a mistake would be easy.
The other morning I was working out at my beloved Refine and as I hopped to my left foot for a little side-jump, I felt my left knee pop (my hip injury is on my right side, for those of you wanting to make connections). The pop felt like an intense burst of pain in the front of my kneecap that left me in shock for a second. It then turned to a dull ache for the rest of class, which luckily was only about a minute long because it happened at the very end.
By the time I got to work the pain had all but disappeared. This pop had happened once before, a couple of months ago, and I went completely back to normal after, so I thought little of this.
The next day I was in Core Fusion Cardio, and during the warm-up we stand with our legs parallel and slightly bend our knees. During that tiny bend, the pain started again.
Nooooooooooo. No no no no no. No.
My knee continued to hurt during class, specifically during the times my left knee needed to bend. Bending knee = pain. A symptom. I took it very easy on my left side, barely participating in these bendy moves. On my walk home, I realized it would probably not be the best idea to run the Celebrate Israel Run in Central Park that I had signed up for the very next day. Sorry, Jews.
I was bummed because this was going to be my first race post-hip injury. I was so excited to be back in the running and racing game! I decided to ice my knee and see how I felt later on before making any definite decisions, but I had a feeling the race would not happen. And I was fine with that. As long as I can run again by the start of marathon training in July, I will be (mentally) fine. I don’t need to run much before then, especially if rest will heal me.
That night, my knee was still bothering me and I turned off my alarm to wake up for the race. I felt happy with my decision, and proud of myself for being a grown-up and not insisting on running the race anyway. Yes, I hate wasting money, but of course my health is more important and well worth the $18 entry fee.
However . . . I had signed up to try the brand new Barry’s Bootcamp class later that day. And here is where things got tricky.
I mean, look at these pretty people.
[Source: Well and Good NYC]
Barry’s Bootcamp is popular in Los Angeles, and this was their opening weekend in New York. Lots of people I know from blogging were attending this weekend. I was excited to try this new class, which has been named “The Best Celebrity Workout” by some magazines, like Allure. Kim Kardashian does it!
But I wondered about my knee. Should I go to class and just take it easy? Would it become impossible to modify for both my hip and my knee? I decided I could probably do it. I figured there would be moves like jump-backs, which I could just modify to step-backs instead of jumps.
Then I remembered reading something about the class. I remembered that strength moves are combined with intervals on the treadmill. Even if I could modify the strength sections (although really the idea of squats seemed impossible too…) there was no way to modify pounding my knees on a treadmill.
I wasn’t sure how much my knee was actually hurting, so I decided to get dressed and head down to Chelsea for the class. If it got too much, I could stop. Really, I just wanted to be there because this is the first weekend it came out and I REALLY wanted to write about it for NBC New York GO Healthy NYC as soon as possible. This class seemed like a big deal and I wanted to be on top of it! It’s for my career, right? Going to class is actually going to my job, I told myself. All in a day’s work.
I walked a few blocks to the subway. I felt a slight twinge in my knee. I got to the subway station and as I started heading down the steps, the pressure in my knee tripled. Walking down steps = pain. Another symptom. So now I had two symptoms: bending and down stairs.
The stairs of pain.
There was no way I could safely run on a treadmill or squat or do any number of exercises in Barry’s Bootcamp. I knew that by going to class and doing these things, working through this pain, would potentially turn what is right now a minor injury into a more serious one. And with marathon training starting in just one month, that is not a risk I should take.
I wish it was that simple. I wish I could say I turned around and walked back without a second thought. I have lots of classes I can write about for NBC New York; it’s not like I needed something right away. I could take Barry’s Bootcamp at any time and write about it later – it’s not going anywhere. Sure, it would be nice to write a review a hot new class the week it comes out, but so what if I don’t? Just because everyone is talking about it doesn’t mean I have to be in on that.
While writing this column is an incredible side opportunity that keeps me in practice and can hopefully lead to the career I want, missing one new workout the weekend it comes out will hardly make or break me. And missing one day of working out won’t make a difference in my body. Not to mention the fact that I am always quick to advise everyone else to rest of they get hurt. How hypocritical of me. Yet I am so adamant to others on the importance of taking it easy, but I have a next to impossible time taking my own advice.
So I turned around and walked back up the subway station stairs. I knew I did the right thing. I learned from my mistake with my hip. Even though I almost went to class anyway – which I realize would have been so, so stupid – I did the smart thing.
I did not work so hard for these last few months and take off so much time from running and Core Fusion to overcome this hip injury just to be derailed by a knee injury! Now is the time I can take care of myself. It had only hurt for a couple of days at this point. This is the time to ice my knee, rest, avoid the things that hurt and get better. Now is the time to take a break from running. Going to that class and running, squatting, jumping would have been doing the exact same thing I beat myself up over doing to cause my hip injury.
I know this. Intellectually, I get it. But being smart is hard.
Still need proof that being smart is hard? Here:
As I headed back home, I thought “Hey Dor! This is the perfect time to check out the Yo Yoga schedule and see if there is a nice rooftop class to take later. That won’t be too hard on your knee.â€
Yes, I still thought this, even after deciding to take it easy. I figured I could still work out, and yoga would be easier on my knee, maybe even therapeutic.
And then, luckily, I came to my senses. What I needed was a TOTAL rest. Yoga involves knee bending! Yoga would NOT be the rest day I so desperately needed. And finally, finally – I was smart. For real.
And here I am in my backyard on gorgeous day, not exercising, but writing (which, I might add, is also considered work). Writing about not being dumb. Again. Even thought I almost was.
