Weekly marathon training posts? For a marathon I still might not be able to run due to a number of injuries and illnesses? When I already abandoned my first three weeks of coach-I-paid-for training plan? Sure, why not.

I’ll just get it out there: I am feeling incredibly disheartened.

Last year, on a hot sunny day in June, I ran two miles to the start of a 5k race. Despite not having run very much or done any sort of speed work or made any real attempts to PR, I knew I’d likely PR just because my running was naturally a lot faster than it used to be. Holy run on sentence; please forgive me.

Anyway, on that day I ran the two miles, I ran the 5k race in 24:27, and I ran another two miles home. I felt awesome the entire time, with the exception of the brutality of the actual race since I busted out the first mile in 6:53 and that is absurd. But I bounced back quickly after the race was finished and I was able to run home with no trouble.

I WON THE RACE. Not really.

I also PR’d a 10K with 8:30 miles on basically no training (not recommended, don’t try this at home).

And incredibly, I ran my first sub-2 half marathon and then I ran the Richmond Half Marathon in 1:57:24. Average pace per mile, 8:58. For 13.1 miles. I never in my life thought I’d see an average under 9:00. And it wasn’t even that tough! I mean, yeah, it was really hard, especially the last few miles. But I never felt like I was going to die. I probably could have pushed a little harder if I wanted. As I said about the first few miles I spent with the 2:00 pace group: It never should have felt that easy.

EASY

My incredibly long winded point is this: last year running at faster-for-me paces came naturally. Which brings me to this year.

HELLO 2013. YOU ARE WONDERFUL IN SO MANY WAYS (puppy! marriage! duplex!) AND A DICKHEAD IN SO MANY OTHERS (neck injury! rib injury! violent cough! stomach worse than ever!).

My first attempt at marathon training began on June 17. I paid for a coach, I had a plan, I was ready to go – and then my rib exploded. Or something. Technically, it was strained but I could barely get up out of bed, it hurt to breathe and every step I took killed me. Training went on hold, Refining went on hold and I semi-patiently waited it out with rest and the opposite of rest in the form of packing my apartment and moving.

Fast forward to last week. I feel OK enough to try running. The doctor told me that running wouldn’t injure my rib any further (although classes that use my core could) and that even if it hurt, I could go for it. So I did.

Richmond Marathon Training – Week 1: July 2-9

Tuesday – 2.2 miles
Wednesday – 3 miles
Thursday – 3.1 miles
Friday – Rest
Saturday – 3.7 miles
Sunday – 5 miles
Monday – Rest
—

Total miles: 17

Now, let’s talk about today’s run (Tuesday, July 9).

Last week was about seeing if I can run. This week is about trying to get back onto my training plan, which called for a 15 min warm up, 3 x miles @ MP (marathon pace) effort with 1 min rest and 15 minute cool down.

My MP goal is 9:30 (ambitious for 2013, not so much for 2012 when I made said goal). This is my first time training to know what a certain pace feels like, so today’s run was really important to me since it will hopefully be the first of many.

BEGIN RUN

The 15 minute warm-up dragged on, but I wanted so much to stick to my plan so I made it through and after my estimated 1.5 miles (I didn’t turn on my watch until it was interval time because there isn’t a way to set a warm-up and cooldown onto it) I was excited to get the real run started.

Mile 1: 9:23

Not bad, right? Right – except my pace was ALL OVER THE PLACE. I couldn’t hold anything steady; instead I watched my pace vary from 8:36 to 11 something at times. Plus, it felt tough. Obviously it was humid and hot and blah blah but still. 9:30 used to be easy for me. I was relieved when my first one-minute rest arrived (rest means easy jog).

Mile 2: 9:48

Tougher. Hotter. Thirstier. More humid. I opted to leave my handheld water bottle at home because I felt like the weight of it was straining my already-injured neck. The tenths of a mile seemed to move so slowly and it was harder to keep my pace. Again, I varied all over the pace spectrum, but I did my best. For this next rest I had to stop for a second, walk for a few seconds and by the time I was jogging again the minute was almost over and I was sad for that. But I can always do one more mile. My RoadID mantra is “In a mile you’ll be feeling fine” per Citizen Cope. If it’s engraved it must be true, right? Also, I need to order a new RoadID today; all my info is outdated. I think I’ll leave the mantra off this one.

Mile 3: 10:03

This was brutal. After two tenths of a mile I had to just stop for a few seconds, walk a few steps, wonder if this nausea was real or in my head and give myself a pep talk. Once I started up again my legs were so tired. After just three miles, my LEGS were tired. That never happened before. I pushed through, doing my best to keep my pace where I wanted to but also accepting that doing what I can is good enough. I was inside this mile forever just trying not to stop again. Once I finished, I turned off my watch, stood against a brick wall and got myself together.

There was no way a 15-minute cool down was happening, or any jogging cool down for that matter. I couldn’t run another step. 4.5 miles at a pace that used to be easy totally destroyed me.

RUN OVER

I wasn’t close to home, so I figure my walk would be right around that 15 minutes and would be a fine cool down. Plus the stop at Starbucks for an Iced Americano. It’s not called a COOL DOWN for nothing, right?

By the time I got home I felt a lot better. I walked the pup, tweeted to ask if people count warm up and cool down into their weekly mileage (Answer: A resounding YES) and here I am now. Defeated and disheartened.

Just a few days ago I was so happy to be able to run again — and I still am! But now I am wondering how attainable my goal is, what my pace would be like without the humidity, how I will ever be able to run more than five miles at a time, if I will ever be able to do more than three mile repeats and if I can even run this marathon.

I know what you will all say, and I love you for it: I’m just coming back from injuries (PLURAL), I haven’t been running in a long time, I took up running again on the most humid week of the year, I can’t expect to come back and be awesome right away, etc. And you’re right. You’re smart.

But it’s still tough for me. Last year I came back to running after a long break faster than ever. But I came back in April and I wasn’t injured, so there’s that. I think I need to run with friends and I don’t have any friends in Jersey City (also makes for very lonely pool days). On my weekend longer runs, I’ll start coming into the city to run with other people.

OH! And I signed up for my first race of the year, Party With a Purpose 5K at 7pm one night next week with Ashley Runningbun. No PRs, no time goals, just running with my friend and then refueling with cocktails. A race is always exciting, especially since I always say I don’t love running, but I do love racing.

And now that I am officially on my coach-created training plan, I’ll do my best to stick to it and hope I begin to see some improvements.

How’s your summer training going? Any other members of Frustrated, Incorporated? You know what they say about misery, after all. Also, I am not actually miserable, I am just being dramatic.

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