The other day, while perusing the interblags, I came across what Kelly from Every Gym’s Nightmare, a personal trainer in Seattle, wrote about protein. One line in particular began to resonate: Every person needs a certain amount of protein a day. Just like calories, if you eat more protein than you need, you store it as fat.

My GI problems force me to eat nothing but protein. Yet I have been gaining weight. I couldn’t figure out why since I figured I am on the equivalent to a somewhat healthier version of phase 1 Atkins, where lots of people lose tons of weight. After reading Kelly’s post, it began to all make much more sense. The problem is, there is nothing I can do about it. And I know it is not all gained weight, part is extreme bloating (as I sit here with my “new big” pants both unbuttoned and unzipped). But there is definite weight gain as well. Of course, when I dread a job interview not because I am nervous or scared, but because I know I won’t fit into my suit pants, I can’t help but freak out, regardless of the reason it is happening. The dread is real. But I now believe it is a combination of what I am eating and bloating from my condition.

As you know, I have been waiting for results from my test. This week, I finally received those results from the doctor who administered the test, but he is not my main GI doctor. After Test Doctor (TD) told me the results, I felt a void that can only be filled with answers. Because TD is not Main Doctor (MD), he really had no reason to sit on the phone and explain the ramifications to me. TD told me he spoke to MD. So I called MD and left a message with his office telling them I want to discuss my results from him. A little later, his secretary called me and told me he didn’t get the results yet and he would call me the next day.

Weird, since TD told me he already spoke to MD. The next day, I called MD again and he called me back at the end of the day. He said he still didn’t get the report, and although he did speak to TD quickly, he didn’t want to say anything definitive until he saw the report himself.

I’m not going to get into what the test proved right now — partly because I want to get a definite answer from MD first so I know what I am talking about, and partly because I don’t know if I will ever get into specifics on here (although feel free to comment or contact me if you want me to tell you privately). But the test did show where my problem is. So I have some insight into my problem. MD told me the name of a condition it might be, but again, he doesn’t want to say for sure without seeing the results. And even though the test showed a definite and serious problem with the way my body functions, there still might be something else going on. The answer I have now wouldn’t necessarily explain my inability to eat a salad or a piece of fruit. I am increasingly frustrated and upset. I just want an answer.

Based on the test results, I am on a new prescription that might or might not help. In a few weeks I will go to see MD and we will discuss everything: the test results, his interpretation, my treatment options going forward. At that time, I will know more.

Here is a funny picture that I found on the tubes while researching my results:  

So for now I still can’t eat fruit, vegetables, bread, rice, anything with fiber or anything I formerly loved. Which leaves…… PROTEIN. I’m sick of it. I’m sick of being in pain. And now, possibly, it is causing me to gain weight as I consume more than my body needs.

Not to mention ALL the nutrients and vitamins I am missing out on.

Zombies in area! Run!

In other news, I tried out my spin shoes on Tuesday. I had no idea where the hook things should go so I just chose an arbitrary spot and tightened them. Then I tried to put them in the pedals and had no idea how. I just kept banging my feet on the pedals until the left one clicked! Then I did the same with the right. I was getting frustrated when finally the right one clicked!  I was in!

It was the class with the teacher I love so that was good, but I wasn’t feeling so great. I had a cramp under my chest and I had that feeling you get when you have hiccups but you’re in between hiccups, the full of air feeling. Still, the time went by very quickly and I burned 408 calories — and I felt it in my calves for the first time!  You really feel yourself pulling the pedal up when you wear spin shoes.

Class ended and snap, my right foot was off the bike. Then I tried to get my left foot off. And I tried. And I tried. When it was becoming clear I had no idea how to get my foot off the pedal, I decided to take my foot out of the shoe and examine more closely. So there I was, bent down in front of the pedal holding my shoe. I could not get the shoe off the pedal! I wiggled and wiggled and then the teacher saw and came to help and popped it right off. Sigh. The one thing I was trying to avoid was getting any extra attention from him; I want to blend in with the class. Oh, well!

As I started to leave, my left hook things got loose! I need to make sure they are both properly tightened before the next class. I think my right one might have been too tight and that is why I couldn’t get it off the bike. I do know how the shoe fits into the pedal now after my thorough examination of my stuck shoe, so hopefully it will be easier next time.

Despite everything I am going through, I am trying my best to stay positive. I used to let my medical problems stop me from exercise and I am trying so hard right now to not let this happen. Yes, I am often in pain when I work out. But I feel great when I do it, that I do it, and I am really beginning to love it and get excited about it. Missy and I will participate in the Revlon Run/Walk (let me know if you want to join our team) and that is something to look forward to. I have a wonderful, supportive boyfriend. I have an adorable, mushy brother who comes with a girlfriend and a puppy! My mom is there for me literally every tiny step of the way, always wanting to find more ways to help and getting frustrated that there is just nothing she can do. And my friends and family have been caring and increasingly understanding. And while I might not be for long, right now I am thankfully employed (and in a place where they are SO understanding about all my doctor appointments). There is a lot of good in my life and I know I am very fortunate.

Still, I can’t help but get down about all this. I look forward to my next visit with MD — speaking of that, I better make that appointment now! Bye, kids.

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