Immediate Hair Help Needed!

UPDATE: I have made a decision. Details at the bottom.

As you know, my real hair is a Jewfro. I have been Japanese straightening it for years with Liscio products and that has made my life so much easier, as I NEVER knew how to control the curls. And I never felt pretty when I had them. I always felt like my face became uglier.

I would either douse them in gel so they looked wet:

dori curls 2

Or not put enough enough gel so they looked just… bad, parts frizzy.  I would blow dry and flat iron my hair straight, which is AWFUL for the hair. Once I discovered thermal reconditioning, I was thrilled — my life was made immediately simple, my hair dried flat and I didn’t have to pick up a hair iron!

I vowed to do this forever.

dm_bday

(See Missy behind me!)

And then I accompanied my curly haired boy to Devachan. A salon that specialized in curly hair, started by Lorraine Massey, author of Curly Girl — a book that changed the way curly girls thought about their hair, saw themselves, styled their hair — and looked and felt.

Everyone in that salon had curls. The receptionists, the stylists, the assistants — everyone. It was like a cult. As I sat there with my (fake) stick straight hair I just wanted to stand up on a chair and shout, “I AM ONE OF YOU!!!!” I became worried that they would immediately disregard me as a straight haired person and was desperate for them to know the truth — that I belonged! I BELONGED IN THE CURLY HAIR MECCA.

While I was there, I read through the Curly Girl book. I spoke to curly hair specialists. I looked around at all the gorgeous curls and felt a desire to be like them. I started wanting to grow out my hair. Not get it straightened (this weekend). See if by learning the correct technique  from Devachan and Curly Girl, my hair could look beautiful too. If I could have ringlets that surround my face.

There are tricks I never even knew about. Terrycloth towel drying is bad for curls. Microfiber towel or t-shirt drying is much better. Shampoo (I knew not to do it often, but didn’t know to do it NEVER) is a no-no. Devachan makes a “No-Poo” cleanser which doesn’t have shampoo’s harsh sulfates. There are ways to get hair not frizzy without being crunchy. Who knew?

I wasn’t making any quick decisions. That is, until the receptionist said to me as the boy was paying, “We cut straight hair too, just so you know.”

I couldn’t take it. “Actually. . .my hair is very curly. It is Japanese Straightened. But I want to grow it out!”

The receptionist told me that their stylists assist many people through the transition process and teach their clients how to manage hair that is curly on the very top and then stick straight throughout. Yes, it would be a long (about 2 year) process before I even know how my curls would look, but at least if I get it cut there I could learn the best way to handle it.

I was sold. Sort of.

I made an appointment with a senior stylist who deals extensively with relaxing and chemical processes. He is experienced and the best person there to help me transition. I made the appointment for a few days after my straightening appointment, so I could easily cancel if I decided to straighten.

I didn’t know what I wanted to do, so I let it go for a little while. Then I decided I definitely wanted to straighten. And now, on the day I need to decide (have to cancel the straightening today to not get charged) I am torn. I registered at NaturallyCurly.com and read all the message boards. I researched and researched. I learned about Jessicurl.com and watched her video. I think it might be possible, might look nice, to have curly hair. And I read countless reviews of Devachan about people who finally, for the first time in their lives, learned that their frizzy, messy curls are in fact textured and beautiful! They just needed the information in how to style them correctly. What if that could be me?

My face is also a different shape than it was back then. My face used to be round and has since narrowed out. I don’t even KNOW what curls would like like on my new face.

I tried to find out:

after

But summer is the time I like to wash my hair and go! No styling necessary, leave with wet hair and be freeeee! Of course, after a few months it becomes difficult to deal with on top with the regrowth — until I get it done again and all is well with the world. But maybe — just maybe — I don’t need to spend hundreds a year on straightening and look forward to the date I can finally get there. But I don’t know! But if I am going to grow out my curls, I’d better start now since it is such a long process.

If I do decide to grow out my curls, I will get a good 2-3 inches cut off at Devachan to speed up the process and make my hair grow faster. I will also try and stop using the hair iron so much…. but will I look bad?? For a long time until it grows out??

regrowth

(About 3 inches of curl on top here)

Also, when my hair is straightened, things like going in the pool are easy and carefree. I don’t know if I want to make these things difficult again! But what if I have beautiful hair that I don’t even know about and am stifling and hiding away??

Please let me know what you think I should do! I need to make the decision ASAP!

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**UPDATE: I have made a decision! I will cancel the Japanese straightening appointment, get my hair cut at Devachan on Wednesday and get a Keratin treatment on Saturday. It costs about the same as the Japanese but it willopen up my curls and defrizz my hair, making my transition a smoother one. It only lasts a few months so I can switch to full blown curl at any time. Thank you for your help!

17 comments on Immediate Hair Help Needed!

  1. Mallory
    June 11, 2009 at 1:40 pm (15 years ago)

    Curls! It is worth a shot and you can always just pull your hair back if it is having an off day. If you don’t do it you will be having this battle back and forth about curls for hundreds of years!

    Reply
  2. gillian halpern
    June 11, 2009 at 2:00 pm (15 years ago)

    dori! how are you? i just read your blog by chance and totally picked the right post to start with. i had my hair brazilianed with keratin yesterday. its not harsh like japanese or straight brazilian, it just relaxes and smoothes. maybe do that as a transition. i never wanted to do the japanese bc you are left without the option to go curly. i hate my curls, but i also dont want to give them up. keratin is a good in between. also there are lots of shampoos without sulfates out there, prob cheaper than the salon kind. i just buy the fancy ones bc im too lazy to read thru drug store labels. i hope this is helpful! xo

    Reply
    • Dori
      June 11, 2009 at 2:02 pm (15 years ago)

      Gillian – Hi! The perfect person to read this! So I was warned explicitely never to do Brazilian because of the formaldahyde in it. But I did hear there is one without formaldahyde and that sounds like the one you did. I think my mom got that done on top of her Japanese — I will look into it!

      Reply
  3. Danielle
    June 11, 2009 at 2:14 pm (15 years ago)

    Just last week when I read your post with the japanese straightening I started thinking about doing it to my super curly hair as well.
    But the more I thought about it the more I realizied it wasn’t for me. Somedays I love having curly hair and if my hair suddenly wouldn’t hold a curl anymore I’d be so upset. They say that if you have curly hair you want straight and vice versa, but with curly hair you really do have the best of both worlds, because when you want it straight at least you have the option. In the summer I love just being able to shower (and what’s this about not using shampoo that makes me so nervous lol) and put a small amount of curling mousse in my hair and leave the house. If I use a small amount of mousse it doesn’t give it that crunchy wet look but creates loose tendrils. Sure somedays I curse my hair especially when it’s 90 and humid but for the most part I love them, with my group of friends I’m the only one with curls and I love that I stand out a little.
    Do whatever’s right for you but I think you should try the curls! Your hair is gorgeous straight though so whatever you decide will be fine! Can’t wait to hear what you decide.

    Reply
  4. mrs. v
    June 11, 2009 at 2:17 pm (15 years ago)

    girl, u look beautiful with any kind of hair. i must say, when u had the gel-fortified curls u looked straight gansta!! lol

    Reply
  5. Missy
    June 11, 2009 at 2:52 pm (15 years ago)

    Hahhaha I am laughing at the first picture! It still might be my favorite one of us! I say go with the curls!!

    Reply
  6. roberto
    June 11, 2009 at 2:58 pm (15 years ago)

    “No-Poo” cleanser — hahahaha 😀

    it almost seemed like you were in an “AA-like” meeting… yes, i admit it, i am a drunk/curly! 🙂

    Reply
  7. amy
    June 11, 2009 at 4:44 pm (15 years ago)

    I had a Keratin treatment 3 weeks ago. I have not frizzed yet! It won’t make it straight–I still flat iron if I want that–but no matter how humid–I have NOT frizzed!

    Reply
  8. bhealthier
    June 11, 2009 at 9:36 pm (15 years ago)

    oooo i hope it turns out well!!! I like your decision! I WISH I had curly hair… grass is always greener right?

    Reply
  9. Jen, a priorfatgirl
    June 11, 2009 at 9:44 pm (15 years ago)

    um…I am so bummed I missed the voting process! 7 hours late and you made a decision without me! Well, at least you made the right decision! I say, it’s just hair – do it do it do it, grow it curly! YOu can always straighten it if you don’t like it!

    Reply
  10. Anne K.
    June 11, 2009 at 9:51 pm (15 years ago)

    I missed the voting, but I would have said to try the curls! If you don’t like it, you can def. straighten it again. And girl, you are so gorgeous. You’ll look stunning with any kind of hair!

    Reply
  11. Holly
    June 12, 2009 at 7:16 am (15 years ago)

    I am blessed/cursed with curls, too. Somedays I hate it, but I’ve actually grown to love them and can’t imagine being without them! I straighten it sometimes but always end up missing the curls. Your hair is gorgeous either way!

    Reply
  12. Diana (Soap & Chocolate)
    June 12, 2009 at 10:49 am (15 years ago)

    Wow you look so different with and without curls! Doesn’t matter since I think you look fab either way but the change should be fun, eh? My hair is somewhere between curly and straight, mostly just annoying. 🙂

    Reply
  13. elise
    June 12, 2009 at 11:50 am (15 years ago)

    well, since youve already made the decision ill hold off on my 2 cents…but i think the pic of you with the straight hair and missy int he background is soopah cute 🙂

    haha, way to rock the jewfro!! i have a few friends who went through HS with the product loaded hair look too.

    ok, well anyways, im not sure if you have google reader or not, but you need to change your subscription (even though my website address hasnt changed) to http://www.hungryhungryhippie.com/feed

    technology will never ever ever be my friend. grrrr. please update – i dont wanna lose you! even though i cant make it to missys bday party (leaving for hawaii in a few days) we have to organize another nyc blogger event soonso i can meet you all 🙂

    Reply
  14. trish (girlatgym)
    June 13, 2009 at 5:38 pm (15 years ago)

    You crack me up – “I am one of you!”

    But I know how you feel. I have curly hair too and half the time I just iron it out because its just easier. And no stylist seems to know how to cut it right.

    I am dying to grow it out now because the last guy who cut it did a terrible job. It doesn’t help that I have a cow lick either.

    Reply
  15. Michelle @ Find Your Balance
    June 15, 2009 at 12:01 pm (15 years ago)

    That’s two posts in a row you somehow referred to yourself as ugly. PLEASE! Get outta here with that 🙂

    Reply

1Pingbacks & Trackbacks on Immediate Hair Help Needed!

  1. […] As you know, I went to Devachan on Wednesday evening to get a much needed haircut my a curly hair expert. I was also there to learn how to style my curls so they actually look good and to get advice on the transition of curl on top, straight on bottom. When I accompanied the boy there a couple weeks ago, I felt like I was drafted into an elite club but was missing the main requirement to join. I decided I wanted to join. […]

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