On the road to recovery?

Of course, my hope is that one day in the not-too-distant future the doctors will finally figure out what is wrong with me so that I can:

1. Eat the foods I want
2. Not feel like death after eating
3. Not be so bloated that all clothes are uncomfortable, tight and painful
4. Attend social events where food will be available
5. Drink alcohol
6. Have energy
7. Get ANSWERS! A diagnosis. Something concrete so that even if I can no longer eat anything I want anymore, at least I know WHY and can see a nutritionist and try and figure out how to best work with the problem. But first, there needs to be a problem!

Among hundreds more reasons, really. I have been sick for a year and a half now, and I think we can all agree that enough is enough!

Yesterday I visited the doctor who does tests for the test that I *hope* and, even more importantly, believe will provide the answers I so desperately need. This test is called the SmartPill. Yesterday morning, I arrived at the doctor’s office and they ordered me a breakfast from Viand, which just happens to be a favorite diner of mine! They ordered (and I had no say in this) an egg white omelette with dry white toast. Yum!

So I ate the meal and then had to swallow one of these babies:

Yummy. And sexy. I was given a monitor to carry around with me. It can not get any further than 5 feet away from me the entire time (through next Wednesday). The doctor kept ensuring me it is no bigger than a BlackBerry. A BlackBerry from 1991, maybe:

That thing is huge. And HEAVY. It comes with a cord to wear around my neck, but it is so heavy that during the day I often keep it next to me instead. The problem with that is that if I run to the fridge, to get tea, etc, I forget to bring it. Then I get worried that I am skewing the results and will never get my real answers. But it really is just too heavy to keep on my neck at all times.

So what happens is this pill takes measurements of my digestive tract’s pH, pressure and temperature and transmits the numbers to the monitor. When I am done with the test I bring the monitor to the doctor, he plugs it in to a special computer is comes with, and all the results are there!

Normally, according to the website, people naturally excrete the pill in 24-48 hours. This will not be the case with me. So, my doctor and I decided on Wednesday as a good day to return the monitor for results.

I am hopeful about this one. The problem is somewhere, and I do believe this should give insight in to where. So does my doctor. Once we know where the issue is, we can attempt to treat it. I say attempt because all treatments I have tried so far have not helped. But at least I will know where the problem is, have a name for my disorder and instead of vaguelly telling people, “I have stomach problems…not sure”, I can instead say “I have this.”

Then I would like one of two things to happen:

1. Treatment works and I can eat what I want, get back to normal weight, etc
2. Acceptance. I have to be stuck not being able to eat fruits, veggies, etc and I visit a nutritionist to work out a delicious, healthy meal plan that works for me, but I will accept that this is my size and these ae the foods I can/can’t eat and accept it

So I will probably have to keep this thing with me until Wednesday, and I CAN’T WAIT to bring it to the doctor. I am excited to hear something — anything. Maybe I can even get my life back…